Backpacking with the Three Stooges (Thailand Leg) -Part #1

Settling in:

After my first visit to Thailand (back in 2015), I felt like I had my fill of Southern Thailand. I was not excited about returning for another week holiday. I was willing to give the North a fair first impression though (as it is strangely different from the South). There was nothing wrong with experiences had in the past while travelling in Thailand, but I was not as interested in the party areas and full moon parties as in the past. To be honest I would not have given Thailand a second glance if it were not for the fact that two of my friends (who I was travelling with) had never travelled there.

(this was one of those long walk days XD I am thrilled, just pouched-left)

The flight to Chiang Mai from Dalian (Liaoning), China was a long but pleasant flight as we flew in with the ever so luxurious, Korean Air. We were going to be arriving late, this was great because we were able to align two flights within a similar time frame to meet in Chiang Mai that evening with a counterpart departing from Canada. My friend who flew in from Canada, ended up having a night long layover in Shanghai; he had never been to Asia and had no idea what to expect. To be honest, it had been a year since I had last seen this guy. I was also travelling with two other individuals who were coworkers and close friends of mine. With that said after Shanghai, he was officially off the grid, we were generally in contact through email but then came the time where WIFI was in short supply and WIFI kiosks were tough to access if you didn’t have a working/local phone number.

(Whole row of seats, get your naps, naps here)

Luckily, no credit-card machine malfunctions this time around landing in Thailand, got in a cab and made it to “Nina’s Guesthouse”, this was a low budget guesthouse with a small number of individuals running it intimately. The guesthouse was located within the old city walls around some great little restaurants. Note, when I say low-budget, I mean so low-budget that one of our pack members really argued with the travel group for a change in accommodation for the last three days to a touch less “low-budget” Guesthouse (The Green Guesthouse).

I was approached with open arms, a bandana, long pony boy hair, hemp accessories and a smile like he has already fallen in love with this country. “HEY!” as we approached the hostel. It turned out that in fact, the last time I saw my friend from Canada he was completely different. Before the trip he was a very professional and stoic individual. This was my best friend’s older brother. To paint a picture for you, he would actually lock us outside in the snow while we were in shorts hanging out in the house during winter (we were all pricks to each other for fun and likely deserved it) but essentially, we were basically just a bunch of youngsters the last time we actually hung out and saw each other. I had no idea from then on what would later unfold in just great stories and experiences-usually. Sure enough-being a lady’s man, he was chit-chatting with some coworkers of ours who we unexpectedly booked in the same guesthouse as us.

(Hair of the dog.)

My two friends were not crazy about the guesthouse as it was pretty basic but for the price, there was not much to say, they provided a safe, locked door and a bed. Later we ended up relocating to the “The Green Guesthouse” reasons of bathroom facilities. We found the upgrade worthy and quite nice as we were able to get a couple private rooms and have a few more amenities attached to the guesthouse itself (instead of needing to find laundry, beer and food elsewhere all the time). There was a great Pad Thai stand outside which we took advantage of a couple nights while drunkenly stumbling back from the bars.

To See and Do:

Elephant Sanctuary visits become a real experience when you realize how disgusting it actually is. There are some controversial sanctuaries but going with some recommendations by bloggers pretty well ensures you will just genuinely enjoy your visit. I refuse to use the name of the one we went to as we certainly signed up with the wrong one.

(I'm playing the naive tourist card here-it wasn't till thereafter that we had realized what had transpired.)

We spent majority of the day on foot around the sanctuary checking things out and snapping pictures with another decent portion of the day in the car on the way there and back. Being thirsty and hungry-we found sanctuaries of our own.

An evening later we picked up scooters to putt around town on and plotted a short trip to “the tallest mountain in Thailand”. #Truestory, Doi Inthonan is accessible by foot and vehicle. The purpose for travelling to this national symbol is quite self explanatory, tallest mountain in Thailand and accessible by motor bike. Getting the motor bike is relatively easy, one can go to any scooter rental place and offer a photocopy of the passport as insurance and confidence provided by saying “Yes, I have driven a motor bike before” when asked by the manager. I would not recommend driving to the mountain on an empty or even half empty tank it is quite the ride. The ride was at least two hours to get there on motor bike at high speeds. It is strongly recommended against telling the owner what you plan on doing with the bike as the distance and chance for police stops makes them quite nervous.

The ride out is an early one and quite worth the risk. Once a driver gets out of the Chiang Mai city limits, it is fun open road. Stop off for breakfast or request “to go” food from your guesthouse. Not many places will be open at the time of the morning. You should plan on leaving with some snacks or coffee in bag on your way out of the city walls. If you plan on observing and seeing everything the mountain has to offer-as my friend did, you will literally be there all-day hustling to get back before dark. Night time driving in Chiang Mai is significantly more dangerous than during the day for the reasons of navigation, familiarity to landmarks and road conditions.

The day on Doi Inthanon is one that should not be missed. Enjoy a pleasant view of the mountain range, Buddhist temples, gardens and more waterfalls than one cares to see. Waterfalls are scattered from the bottom to the middle of the mountain down what look like sketchy dirt roads and some claim to have an entrance fee but normally you won’t see anyone hanging out there in the ticket booths later in the day.

Bars were a heck of a lot more tame in the North than what they were in the South. They (in my opinion really are that bad) it is simple to understand that if one is looking for trouble one will find it most anywhere. But I made a point of telling my friend that we would not go to the South this trip-wanting the full Thailand stereotypical sights of nightlife we were able to dig up a go-go bar in Chang Mai (its not hidden and actually required no digging) we actually walked by it almost 4 times a day in some cases. The North has its Go Go Bars (Spotlight) and Brothel Bars (Spicy’s) but it was certainly nothing like Patong Beach-I am satisfied to never return there again.

I was feeling bad at first for hyping up Thailand to my friend before that but at the same time, relatively thankful as I did not need to worry as much as I would had we been in the South on Bangla Road regularly or in the abyss of lights and water on Koh Phi Phi. In Chang Mai, Bars varied. From fun and interesting with local Thai working girls to boring loud and obnoxious foreigners on vacation looking for a hook up. To each their own, I am married so for me its quite simple really; eat, get drunk, have fun, spend money, sleep, repeat. I find travelling married liberating for that reason in Chiang Mai, but in the evening there is not much to do so it does get quite boring unless you are a writer or find card players in your guesthouse. So many girls there are working girls, they will gladly just talk to you if you sit down next to them but be prepared for end of the night follows and the ask. Play your cards right though, be flirty and look good, you might get lucky without the cash.

Watch Out for:

Rumours of Pai, this is a few things I heard while speaking to the wrong people I fear/hope. But it is important to keep in mind, as it could influence your decision making based on your susceptibility to peer pressure. Pai, as beautiful as it is and as fascinating as its location is for the reasons of border crossing, one should be aware that it is known for its accessibility to opium. I am not scared of drugs or even “anti-drugs” but I am a person who knows trouble when its staring me in the face and the fella who had recommended taking a “trip” in Pai, had troubled embossed all over himself. I should have expected just out of sure luck my friend from Canada, just creating such confusion for me by actually buying into the spirituality of what this guy was going on about in Pai regarding the use of Narcotics and what not. I don’t have time for that-we didn’t explore further.

Heading South:

Following Chiang Mai came the bus ride down to Bangkok, a long ride indeed but pleasant. Do not exchange your bus food voucher, stick to packaged foods. By the time I got to Bangkok I was as sick as could actually be without needing to be hospitalized. Food poisoning hit me so hard and I was not in any regret either as I just gave the guys the information they needed to trek through Bangkok and see the same things I did my first time out, Laying Buddha, Grand Palace, and the Floating Market. The hostel we stayed at was called “Nikita Guesthouse”, located in a back alley off Khaosan Rd. It was an alley that led from Khaosan to the outer small streets surrounding it in which the local Thai people hung out, shopped and ate for the most part.

“Khaosan Rd. With a Vengeance” is how I refer to this leg of the trip, the first time coming here my buddy got sun stroke (maybe also food poisoning), this time I was poisoned and the later few adventures my friends suffered from various ailments while there. The guesthouse receptionist would always come over and ask how I am doing, bring me a cool towel for my forehead and allowed me to sleep on the couch during the day as my friends went out and waited for the dorm to be prepped for us.

First time to Tiger Temple or was it called Kingdom? Controversy lingered in the air as we handed money to the clerk for tour tickets to Tiger Temple in “Bangkok”. The exact location of the Tiger Temple is about an hour outside Bangkok in a small town that was a key part of Japanese occupancy during World War II. On a bus with a bunch of other foreigners we knew what was coming our way and hung our heads a bit low on this decision. On the upside to this mortifying day trip, we checked out a small quaint town that had a Art and War Remnants Museum of decommissioned Locomotives by the Japanese during World War II, the town was a location in which the Japanese were building bridge and railway through to move their ammunition with efficiency into India and Burma.

“Spicy” is indeed a thing in Thailand, and curry is certainly a specialty. Learning how to cook these things for a girlfriend or loved one ensures bonus points. I would seriously recommend it if not for the skills, for the food that you make yourself. You would be surprised how good and easy some recipes are. The tour we booked was through the guesthouse we stayed with and that was booked out in the “countryside”. It was a simple day, get to the pick up location and then take a Tuk Tuk to the train station, jump on the small locomotive and head to a town about an hour away. Its strange as we were wandering through town making our way to an organic garden that is used as a cooking studio for foreigners like ourselves. A full day activity that allowed us to ride bikes around town, see what is happening in this small place, meet some locals and enjoy the curry, soups and salads we made from scratch. It was so strange because it all just panned out so pleasantly-no awkward wrong bookings or departure points. The food and company were great, we had some excellent food. Couldn’t have asked for much more that day.

Soi Cowboy was really not as bad or seedy as I thought it was going to be.